Let's do dinner and drinks

Such a popular text, tweet or facebook status update: The infamous dinner and drinks. Now while I usually have no problem with a same-sex rendevous at an establishment that boasts both delicious entrees and heavily garnished cocktails, the phrase dinner and drinks drives me to insanity.

I don't know if people offer these arbitrary encounters out of an obligatory sense of losing touch or they want people to think that they are sophisticated because "going for dinner and drinks" is such a mature thing to do. I mean why not catch a revival of "South Pacific" at a community theatre while you're at it. I suppose this dinner and drinks idea just stands against anything I could ever be in favor of. It implies polite conversation at a trendy spot, ordering an expensive meal, becoming lightly buzzed and then awkwardly fumbling over the check when your waitress assumes you are a gay couple out for a night on the town and fails to split it. (An assumption that would have never been made in the 1950's) So there you are with someone who you aren't great friends with enduring an awkward stand-off for who will pick up the bill. You cave, of course, and now you are $100 lighter in the pocket, sober and you don't even get to take your date home and relieve some aggression.

Perhaps I am being a bit cynical, but I view the entire concept of "let's grab dinner and drinks" as laughable. Look how adult we are, but we are also fun because we can go out and casually drink...on a work night whooooooaaaaa.

I am not however opposed to going out to eat and getting serious on the consumption...listen to how I tell pretty much the exact same scenario but with a different attitude, I go from sounding like a prissy C-muscle to a straight up bro.
"Hey you want to go to Uncle Julio's and see how long it takes for us to get kicked out?" I am still implying that I would like to go on a man-date to a food establishment, but instead of trying to convince people I'm so adult by using the catchphrase "dinner and drinks" I basically asked if my partner in crime would like to accompany on a bit of midweek binge drinking at an establishment that just so happens to serve tacos.

So next time one of you is considering asking me whether or not I would like to accompany you to get something to eat, just ask with a little bit of integrity and I will be more than happy to oblige you.