I do this extremely weird and morbid thing where I set myself extremely low short term goals when I get excited about an upcoming event. Any by low short term goal, I mean the goal is usually maintain a pulse and my civillian freedom until that event occurs.
At my old job I often set the goal not to get fired before the following Friday, a goal I accomplished 104 out of 105 tries...only in corporate America would a success rate over 99% be considered an overall failure. Perhaps I aim my sights a little too low too often, but I saw the movie 50/50 last night and there is a scene where a hysterical (the sad kind not the funny) JGL calls his therapist and cries about how if he dies in surgery tomorrow he will have never been to Canada or told a girl he loves her...and I've done both those things so I'm doing just fine, and I don't have life threatening surgery for tomorrow. So my goal for the rest of the week is to stay alive and out of jail until Saturday because Blink 182 is playing the Hollywood Bowl.
Fuck yes! It's amazing how little has changed in the past 10 years, well for me at least. I'm a new person in a strange place (high school/California) the economy is shit, and my sole ambition is to make it to the weekend so I can rage with a bunch of teenagers at a Blink show.
Sure the motivation has changed, this time I will be blind drunk, I'll presumably be surrounded by 30 somethings and their young kids, causing an absolute scene, tripping over chairs and ultimately being removed, but fuck it. That music takes me back to a simpler time, backyard football, disabling home alarms in order to sneak out to meet girls and have makeout parties and riding bikes around the neighborhood, so excuse me if I want to spend my entire Saturday doing the same shit a decade later. Not worrying about protocol on whether or not to text that person you met over the weekend, whether or not you can afford next weekend's trip to vegas, simply worrying if you can sneak a small water bottle of your parents' liquor into the show and if finding a ride to and from will be an issue.
It's amazing how as you grow (most) people develop a filter. They understand when and with whom certain topics are appropriate. Courtesy and tact also develop during this maturation process. I would argue that I kind of miss the brutal honesty that comes along with being a kid. You only invited your friends to things, not worrying about the fallout from excluding a certain crowd and you would call anyone a cunt without fear of violating some social norm. It was the epitome of "not giving a fuck." It feels like socializing at this point is some stupid game that everyone has to play in order to win. I try to add some chaos to the situation and speak my mind most of the time, usually I get some sort of free pass for an unknown reason, but I like trying to turn the social climbing idea on its head from time to time and finding out what happens.
Back in the day you could become popular if you had one of the cool parents who would buy the parental advisory copy of Enema of the State and buy your tickets to American Pie, now it's all about your perceived value to others. I probably can't get you a job out in L.A. The most famous person I know in the industry would be a tie between a guy who had a guest spot in the tv spin off 10 things I hate about you and a guy who was 4th billed in a movie about saving some stupid fucking owls. That said, if I can survive the next 5 days, not get locked up for failing to register my vehicle in California and no family emergency beckons me to the midwest, I will be having the time of my fucking life on Saturday night and that's really all that matters.
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